A Roman holiday to celebrate

The best way I know how to celebrate an accomplishment is to go to Rome. I was recently selected to be a Department of Energy Fellow. To celebrate we rented this apartment. It was a great location with beautiful views of the city center.

The train ride down from Vicenza was eventful. There were multiple delays, and drunk Americans on their way to Florence. I know they were drunk because they drank straight vodka out of water bottles for the three-hour ride to Florence. Things were quiet after they left.

As planned we met Dr. LeVeness, one of my professors from graduate school for dinner, and my dear friend Denise also from graduate school. She has a dream job at the American Embassy in Rome. No Rome trip is complete without a visit to my friend Carlos' restaurant Baires. We spent the evening reminiscing about the amazing times we all had in grad school. Dr. LeVeness has this amazing gift of making the people around him feel like they are smartest people in the room. It's a lovely gift.

Saturday morning I woke up early to do a little shopping without Ryan. We met up around noon for lunch at Court Delicati. This is supposed to be the best Asian restaurant in Rome. It did not disappoint. It is located a little outside of the city center near the UN, my old stomping ground when I was in grad school. We visited San Giovanni and The Mouth of Truth. Exhausted from walking around in the 90 degree heat all day we stopped for a few cold ones at a bar to decide on dinner.

We settled on Sapore di Mare. It was an average seafood dinner which does not say much I know.

Sunday we met Dr. LeVeness and his colleague Dr. Clarke for a very fancy brunch. Plenty of prosecco and an all you can eat buffet. We stuffed ourselves for hours then said our goodbyes before taking a taxi to our train. Dr. LeVeness will visit us in September. I cannot wait!

Our Roman getaway was just what the doctor ordered.

That in fact did just happen

We have been eating a lot of fresh fish lately, especially tuna. Ryan's preferred way to prepare it is to sear it with freshly ground salt and pepper. The keys to this dish are of course good quality fresh tuna, a non stick skillet and the right amount of salt and pepper. We have been looking for the perfect salt and pepper grinder for some weeks without luck. This morning I took an early morning stroll around town. I walked down one of those cobblestone, picturesque streets Italy is famous for, when I saw a small kitchen appliance store. In the window was the perfect pair of glass salt and pepper grinders. Excited I walked in on two older Italian men talking. They were surprised to see me, and it felt as though I had interrupted something. Undeterred by their surprise, I inquired about the salt and pepper grinders I saw in the window. One of the Italian men slowly gathered his belongings and left. As he walked out I realized I was in this shop alone with what could be easily described as a creepy old man in some circles.

He came around from the behind the counter to show me the grinders. He said they were in the back and motioned for me to follow him. Eager to surprise Ryan with the grinders I followed him toward the back of the store. Suddenly he turned around before I knew what was happening he grabbed my shoulder and pulled me into an awkward embrace. I wedged my larger than average purse in between us quickly. He asked if I was married. I said YES and squirmed away from his frail torso. He held onto my arm as I pulled away and looked at me with what I can only describe as a combination of desperation and lust. Grossed out and disappointed, I walked quickly out of the store.

Back on the photogenic street, across from a church I looked back at the little shop and confirmed with myself yes, that in fact did just happen.

I am ashamed to admit this

I like to follow beautiful women. There I said it. I like to follow beautiful, well dressed women around, and today I got exactly what I wanted from her. This is not the first time I have done this. I have followed impeccably dressed women around in New York, Paris, Lima,Tunis and lots of other places, but they never led me anywhere interesting. Usually I follow them until they notice me and I stop or get lost.

Today I went out to pay my cell phone bill because my account was compromised last month and I had to get a new card. This is the first time this ever happened to me. I was walking to the Vodafone store when I saw this dark haired, six foot tall Italian woman. I have seen her before. She's not easy to forget with those legs. It was freezing today, and she was wearing these comfy shearling boots with extra socks and tights and a clingy mini skirt. On top she was wearing a short leather jacket trimmed with fox fur. I wondered how she came to be so effortlessly stylish. She was walking much faster than I was, but I kept up analyzing all the details of her outfit. She abruptly turned into the shoe store on the corner. I never go into that shoe store. There are too many choices in there. I don't want Ryan to ever see me in the rapture of my shoe compulsion..before or after, but when the glamazon walked in there I knew I had to follow. She zeroed in the pair of boots I spotted earlier this week. I went to pay my cell phone bill, and when I came back she was still in the store. I went in and bought the boots. It's not like I had a choice! She watched me strut around in my brown suede boots and asked the shop boy if he was sure they did not have a size 10. He assured her that they did not. I guess there are some drawbacks to being six feet tall.

I came home feeling right as rain with my brown suede, fur trimmed boots. Photos to come.

Another unbelievable day at the office

My work is challenging, but rewarding. I work with victims of sexual assault mostly, but often I help with victims of domestic violence as well. It is a tough job because it is often emotionally taxing. At least once a week someone reminds me that they could not do my job. They shake their heads slowly saying things such as it could not be me.

The fact is someone has to do this job. I happen to have the unusual skill set to do it well. I was a volunteer Victim Advocate for three years in my hometown, New York City. The training was intense, but in some respects that was the easy part. I spent one weekend and one weeknight a month on-call waiting for my phone to ring. As a twenty something New Yorker that is normal, but I was not waiting for a call from a previous date. I was waiting for a call from the Emergency Room of the three hospitals I was assigned to. My job was to go the hospital and advocate for victims who might be too traumatized to do so themselves. The stories I heard were harrowing tales of distress, violence and fear.

Prior to the volunteer experience I was terrified of hospitals, but I knew how to handle myself well under pressure. I thought volunteering in a hospital would rid me of my fear. It worked.

I do not discuss cases here because they are confidential, and I do not want to traumatize my friends with details about my work. Yet, how I ended up in an office with a female Solider in uniform and three other uniformed Soldiers watching her grope me requires some background.

The Army has set up a special office for attorneys who take sexual assault cases to Court Martial. One of these special prosecutors came to Vicenza to interview one of the victims I am helping. I went into the meeting with strict instructions from JAG not to speak during the meeting. I had to just sit there with her, and be supportive without talking. She asked for my help but, I could not answer. So when the special prosecutor asked for my consent to let the victim demonstrate on me how her offender grabbed her I was eager to help.

Before I knew it she was palming my butt with her fingers grazing my nether regions. Talk about a complicated situation. I was not prepared to have her touch me that way. The fact that she did so in front of three men as they watched is a discussion that I could have for hours. I took the appropriate actions after the interview, and added the experience to another unbelievable day at the office.

John Luther the British anti-hero

I am nothing else if not curious about how people like me (whatever that means) live in other parts of the world. It has driven most of my varied travel experiences. Even with this curiosity I have shied away from British television. I have quite a few British relatives who tell me about their tv shows and stars who make the switch to American television and film. I am often surprised to discover they are indeed in British.

That brings me to Idris Elba. I had no idea this good looking bloke was British. He exudes the swagger and roughness of the dreamboats of my Brooklyn youth. I was fairly shocked to know they grew that way in the United Kingdom. I didn't watch The Wire,, but I heard he was great. He was sensational on the American version of The Office. He had role in Last summer's Thor, and after he won at the Golden Globes I went ahead and bought the first, then later the second season of Luther on iTunes.

Watching Mr. Elba on Luther you find yourself on edge for most of the hour. It is quite difficult to figure out what he is going to say or do next. He broke a door into pieces in one of the early episodes and I was terrified. His character looms large and in charge of everything except his emotions, which is thrilling to watch. I am thrilled Ryan is no Luther, but I sure enjoy watching Idris strut his stuff round London.

Third time is a charm in Milan

Just back from my third trip to Milan. The first time I went I was an undergrad spending a semester abroad in Rome. It was one of the those wild adventures you have in your 20s.

My best friend Kris at the time and I would go to the train station and hop on the first train leaving. On our Milan trip we met these Turkish guys on the train. Kris had these amazing green eyes that always garnered lots of attention. Any who, theTurkish guys took us to one of the trendiest bars in town where we danced until dawn. The next morning we snuck a peak at Leonardo's Last Supper. This was before the extraordinary restoration project, and we just wanted to check the box that we saw it. We spent the rest of the day walking around looking for the fashion district. We never found it. I left thinking Milan was a much over hyped big city.

The second time I was in Milan Ryan and I decided to go at the last minute..without a plan..for about three hours. This was not a good idea, and we did not have much fun. Three hours is not enough time to see anything. We ended up in a crummy part of town at a bar that served great bacaro, which is heavy tapas. I left with the same mediocre impression of the city.

As they say, the third time is a charm. This time I planned things a lot better. I bought tickets for one of the trips the Army base organizes as part of its Outdoor Recreation program. The Army organizes the transportation, entry tickets and guided tours for Soldiers and civilians. We typically do not go on these trips because most of your time is not your own. They are well suited for those who enjoy traveling dependently. Ryan and I are not these kind of travelers, but in this instance the organized trip was ideal.

I bought the tickets months in advance, and they included the admission to the Last Supper. This was a big plus because arranging for tickets online for admission to the church where the Last Supper is can be a hassle. Since the restoration the Italians are meticulous about the viewing process. We also decided we would leave the group, and head to lunch on our own after the tour.

We picked Colline d' Oro. We love Asian food and it is almost nonexistent in Vicenza. Trip Advisor promised an experience not to be missed. Colline d' Oro lived up to the high expectations. And I finally discovered what all the the hype about fashion in Milan is about. People were impeccably stylish, but also La Rinascente in Milan was the most incredible department saw I have ever seen in my entire life. There was not enough time for me to handle my shopping business, but now I know exactly where to go next time.

Ryan would like me to mention the toddler who screamed as though a demon possessed him for most of the three hour ride..each way, but I won't because the memory causes me to shudder a little.

Rented an apartment in Rome

I am a big believer in setting goals at the beginning of the year. High on my list this year is to spend more time in Rome. I love it here. The first time I went to Rome was in January of 1993. Totally showing my age here. Whatever. I loved everything about the place from the moment I left the airport with those nuns who let let me hitch a ride with them.

I have never been able to let go of my longing to be there. Fortunately Ryan enjoys spending time in the eternal City as well. That's why we resolved to spend more time in Rome this year. We will not live in Italy forever. While we are here it is important to make the most of it. We may not live in Rome but, a three hour train ride is a lot closer and cheaper than an eight hour plane ride from JFK.

We took a day trip in early December last year, but it felt a little rushed. I did not get to shop AT ALL. We spent time with a few friends I have that live there, had dinner, walked around a bit and headed back to Vicenza. We have arranged to go for two nights next month with a couple I recently matched. At first we considered our go to place: Hotel Navona. We stayed there last summer. The location was perfect, but the room was lackluster. It will certainly do in a pinch.

My Brazilian "gay boyfriend" Jeremy was visiting with us from New York. As travel stories go it was a strange coincidence that the owner of the 500 year old palazzo that is the hotel was a former lover a Brazilian novella star. It made for interesting dinner conversation. My friend Carlos suggested the hotel to us. He also suggested a Bed & Breakfast that is directly above his Argentine restaurant Baires. Both options are pricey, especially for a weekend getaway.

Then I discovered this site. I made a few phone calls, sent a few emails and within a few hours I had a deal on the table. I have never traveled this way, but when traveling with another couple it is much more cost efficient.