Have It Your Way at BK

After running a few errands this morning I got hungry. Real hungry. I thought about the pizza waiting for me at home, but Baby Mac was not interested. I considered one of Ryan's homemade hamburgers, when suddenly Baby Mac "communicated" that he wanted a double cheeseburger from BURGER KING. Goodness gracious I have not eaten a Burger King burger in over ten years! Luckily there is a Burger King at the mall where I was buying maternity clothes, but it was too crowded. I drove to base and ordered a double cheese burger, fries and a strawberry milkshake (my dad's favorite).

It was not at all as gross as I remembered it. In fact I found it to be very satisfying right until I bit into the mustard section of the burger. Lawdamercy, did I freak out. I took the burger back explaining that there was mustard on my burger. I probably had that wild-eyed pregnancy look because they made me a fresh one with very little hesitation. All was right again in the world again

Me and Baby Mac

I drove home, enjoyed the rest of my milkshake and sat down to read through some of the pregnancy books my friend gave me and try on some new maternity new clothes.

I found a great store where they carry things that are super comfy and stylish. After a few minutes I announced photo shoot! Ryan is never quite sure if that means someone is coming over to take pictures or we're going somewhere or if he should just grab my iPhone. This time I just needed him to snap a few pictures for the blog of me and Baby Mac. I don't think I'll wear the boots with this outfit, but otherwise it is very comfortable!

Introducing Baby McNamara!

Last Friday we took our little selves down to the Italian hospital for my five month ultrasound. Excited doesn't quite describe how we felt, but we both managed to stay calm. I made the appointment. I decided who would drive and what time we would leave.  We followed the plan, stayed on course and that was it.

The fun part was a few months ago when we first found out I was pregnant. I thought we were having a girl because my emotions were all over the place. Ryan agreed just because. Then the meat fest started. All I was interested in for weeks was red meat. My dad said this was a sure sign that I was carrying a boy. Still I went on calling the bump a she.

Then one night I had the most extraordinary dream. I was in a hospital room, waking from a nap post labor. The first thing I saw were my feet. Ryan came into focus and I asked where's the baby. He cradled a little baby boy wearing a blue newborn cap. He was swaddled in a blanket..swaddle. He had Ryan's very distinct features. I was amazed. I had never seen a baby quite like him. He seemed very self aware. I stared into his eyes and he SPOKE to me in my mind. Yes, kind of like Renesme in Twilight. He said, "I am a BOY. Look at me and see me for who I am. I am a boy ok? Stop calling me a girl." His words were slow and his tone was very mellow. I woke from the dream with a start. Ryan slept soundly next to me. I nudged him,"Ryan, it's boy! The baby is a boy." He had a very typical response,"Oh good." He went back to his sweet slumber without hesitation.

In the morning I reminded him about my dream. I informed him of the indisputable facts of the matter. I had a dream. In the dream I saw the baby. He was wearing blue, and when this newborn spoke to me he clearly articulated that he is a boy. Ryan's response: "What happens next week when you have a dream that it's a girl?"

Unconvinced, he insisted we find out the sex at the ultrasound. At first I protested, saying I wanted to be surprised, but then I realized I already knew I was having a boy. The ultrasound was the confirmation Ryan needed. As the doctor lubed up my belly, she asked if we wanted to know. We both said yes. She warned that sometimes it's hard to tell, but halfway through her sentence the first image popped up on screen. "It's a boy without a doubt." I looked over at Ryan and he was nodding and beaming yes.

We chose a unisex name, Kennedy, but looking at his fuzzy picture we realized that we needed a much more masculine name name for this guy. Back to the drawing board we go. One friend told me not to worry because I would probably have a dream where he tells me what his name is in a few weeks!

Tunnel Vision

Me, Kennedy and my trusted feline companion, Frank

Life is this amazing journey. It is akin to driving through a curve in tunnel where you can only see a few feet ahead of you. At other times you can make out the light at the end. Tomorrow I will be five months pregnant. As I move into this next stage of life I feel very much like I am in the curve of the tunnel, not quite sure what is around the bend. In an effort to extend my vision I scheduled an ultrasound. This will give me a little more information about was is around the bend.

I left work right on time today, but saw a dear friend as I approached my car. We started to chat about the four-day retreat we facilitated with 30 Soldiers, and we couldn't stop talking. Eventually the topic turned to baby KK (Kennedy King McNamara). My friend remarked that she was so excited to meet KK. So many people are waiting to see KK. It was a heartwarming moment for us both. She is a very sweet person that has become part of my little family of friends here.

I have no idea what the next few months have in store for me. I am taking it one day at time. Today someone made a joke that they should start a pool at work to guess the size of the baby. I told her how important it is for me to take this process one step at a time. I think she actually got it. As miraculous and wonderful as this pregnancy is, it's still terrifyingly scary too. Taking it one step at time is certainly the best course of action.

Checking out at Ikea

Last weekend we took a trip to Ikea to look at cribs and other baby furniture. We came back with a pouf for my dressing room, a white bookcase, a rug and an island for the kitchen. We bought absolutely nothing for KK. Nothing. We hated the cribs there and made the excuse that we need to know if it's a boy or girl before we buy any furniture. I am partial to yellow because I have a lot yellow in my undertones, but the baby's father hates the mere idea of yellow furniture. So we wait a few days more for confirmation of what I already know. We are having a boy. I saw him in my dream and he was the most beautiful person I have ever seen.

You Only Know It's Camelot When It Ends

Every so often you hit a sweet spot in your work life. You enjoy your work, your work space is comfy, your colleagues are your work family and your boss rocks. It can be difficult to get all four at the same time, but when you do it's Camelot: The legendary time and place filled with potential and promise of the future. I have had the fortune to stumble upon a professional Camelot four times in my career, and each time I was happy.

The first consisted of the great boss and enjoyable work, my workspace sucked and I didn't have colleagues I considered family. The awesome boss left and I was thrown into chaos for a few months. Then the Dolce Vita happened. I came to share a great office space, with two colleagues that became my work family.  We knew we made each other happy, and understood that there was some special chemistry among us and the space where we worked, but we never saw the end coming. And that is how you know it was Camelot. It is the end that brings the awareness of the specialness of the period. In the years since we've met, we have seen each other through two births, two weddings and the fall of our Camelot.

It would be years before I would find another magical work environment. The change came quickly. My old boss left. Her replacement was her opposite in almost every way. Losing her was not the worst thing, but her replacement didn't inspire any of us on the team. Most jumped shipped, and then there was just the two of us, me and him. It was an exercise in conflict and resolution. We came out on the other side in my third Camelot. This time I had a great office, loved the work, my boss had my back and he became my work family. He was well into his 60s. When we talked movies or books he had an original perspective. There was the time we had him over for dinner and we were discussing the highly intellectual topic of R.R. Tolkien. He told me he remembered reading The Hobbit on the plane to Vietnam. We made a great team, but as all Camelots do, it came to a sudden end.

That brings me to my fourth and current Camelot. This has been the best one yet. My office space is enviable if not highly decorated. I love the work and I am respected for my efforts. My closest colleagues are my work family. We have dinner together most Friday nights and text each other incessantly about both the mundane and the crucial. The very best part of all though is the boss. He is a leader, a mentor, a champion and warrior. He is funny, smart, loyal and curious about everything. He is a family man, a religious man, a fair man and my friend. And for reasons beyond all of our control Camelot is coming to an end. It is a sad time for us but, I hold on to the promise that a new Camelot is coming. It is never the same, but it always amazing.

I watched the entire season of Orange Is the New Black over the Weekend

I know, I should not be holed up in my apartment binge watching American TV shows on beautiful weekends like this one in Italy. I should be at the beach or in the square with friends having a prosecco or taking a stroll up the hill arm in with my beloved. The truth is it is too hot outside to do most of that, and the beaches this time of year are beyond crowded. I am not seeking sympathy for any of this, but felt it necessary to explain why I watched the complete season of an amazing new series called Orange Is the New Black in two days.

Yes, I watched the entire season of Orange Is the New Black (OITNB) over the weekend. I love female prison shows. Women's prisons make for very good drama. I was hooked on a British show called Bad girls a few years ago, but OITNB is American and it is based on true story.

I first heard about Piper Kernan on The Moth storytelling podcast. I was intrigued. Then I heard she wrote a book about her year in prison after she got mixed up in her ex-girlfriend's money laundering business. Before I could start to think about reading her book I heard Netflix created a "web series" based on the book. This was the second series Netflix ran. The first was House of Cards, another hit.

I thought I heard the last of Netflix in 2011 when they changed their name and business model and then changed back and sent apology letters to all of their customers for the shoddy service. I was not convinced they could recover. After watching them flounder for months and my DVDs taking weeks at a time to get here, I gave up and bought Apple TV.  I did not look back until OITNB. There was so much buzz and critical acclaim for the show about a bisexual, WASP, New Yorker, serving time in a Federal penitentiary.

The critics and my friends on FB were right! This show is awesome. I watched all 13 episodes in two days. I even managed to go out for a walk yesterday. I was supposed to meet a friend today, but had to cancel as I needed to get through the last two episodes.

Piper's fiance's parents are right. Prison is changing her. Oh and Alex is very manipulative. I loved this showed. Cannot wait for season two.

My visit with a two star general

MG Sienko and me!

The Army has all sorts of traditions. Being coined is one of them that Americans have borrowed from the British. When an individual or a team has impressed a Commander they shake their hand and insert a coin in their palm. You are supposed to walk around with your most prized coin, and if you are at a bar and you whip out yours and it's from a higher ranking officer than the other guy, he's buying. I only have five coins so far. I am not pulling out coins in bars too often, but I do admire my growing collection from time to time. It is also an awesome memento of a great day.

We have had a steady stream of high profile visits in the past few months. The Secretary of Defense, Vice Chief of Staff of the Army, the Under Secretary of the Army, three members of Congress and the Surgeon General. It's been an exciting time and I have had the opportunity to engage all of them on the work I do.

Despite the family tragedy at the beginning of the year, 2013 is turning out to be a stellar year rich in love, accomplishment and happiness.

Summer wedding Italian style

We are halfway through the summer already, and I only have one beach visit under my belt. It's been that kind of summer. Azzura and Nao's wedding is certainly the highlight thus far. Nao is one of Ryan's air soft buddies. The team and their wives/girlfriends are part of our surrogate family and the third pairing to get hitched in as many years.

Azzura and Nao are both from Soave and have known each other since grade school. They dated for seven years and got married last Saturday 20 July. The wedding was a very traditional Italian affair, which is quite different from an American wedding. For staters there was no wedding party. All of the guests waited outside the church for Azzura to arrive, and when she did arrive it was a very dramatic entrance. Her brother drove their father's cherry red Ferrari with it's feline purr of an engine up the narrow street where we all waited. Her fairytale princess dress billowed inside the car. She would later tell me how she and her brother struggled to get her and her dress stuffed completely into the Ferrari.

Finally the car came to a stop in front of the church and she emerged unruffled. Her father walked her from the car to Nao, who waited for her outside the church. Inside there was a standard mass replete with communion.

After the ceremony we headed deep into the hills for the reception at a well known local winery. Nao pointed out the different grape varietals and encouraged us to try the exquisite red wine made on the grounds. There was an endless array of appetizers. Soon the owner came by and asked in Italian how Nao came to have so many foreign friends. Ryan and I sat together with Arnell, his Soldier friend in uniform and the Japanese-German couple Azzura met at language school in Germany. Nao looked at all of us and said it's just the way it is.

Us in Soave