As is customary on this blog my course of vaccinations were not without a healthy dose of drama. In this case perhaps too much drama. My first dose of the Moderna vaccine was approximately one month ago. My allergist contacted to me to say my asthma qualified me to get my first shot. Up until that moment I was unsure if I wanted the vaccine. High falutin' ideas such as "heard immunity" and "I'll wait and see how it goes" made me feel safe-ish. But when I got that call images of me frolicking in the west village, and parading down Eastern Parkway as I made my way to the Brooklyn Museum flooded my consciousness and I said yes please.
Yet, when the day arrived my needle phobia crept in. How bad is going to hurt? My inside voice replied, "Bad, really bad. It will be worse that vaginal childbirth that one time in north Italy just outside of Venice. This time without the epidural." I shuddered at the thought. I held fast to my visions of frolic and parades. I kept my arm loose as I caught sight of the syringe. The reality that I was about to receive the most expensive vaccine in history, and had the privilege to ponder if I should take it washed over me. It was over before I had time to think much more about it.
A month later I headed back to receive my second dose. I was not feeling well. We have had a spate of dry weather here and my allergy symptoms were severe. When I arrived I asked if I should postpone since I was already not feeling well. The nurse assured me that once I did not have a fever I was fine to proceed with my second dose. Disappointed I shuffled into the room where I waited. So much has been said about the second dose producing a "robust" reaction. I was concerned, and thought about leaving, but I stayed.
This needle I felt. I also felt liquid dripping down my arm. The nurse asked if I was on blood thinners. I'm not, but I have been taking Tylenol for my allergy induced headache. She explained that Tylenol can act as a blood thinner. As blood sprayed and streamed out of my arm I thought of all the times I needed to give blood and it never came. This whole time I just needed Tylenol.
She applied two band-aids and cleaned my arm up and the rest of the room that resembled a small crime scene. I waited the allotted 15 minutes then headed home. I awoke the next morning feeling a bit foggy. By the time I made it to the office the next day I had body aches. At home I had teeth chattering chills, and deep bone aches. My chest burned and then got heavy. My eyes were dry and gritty. My stomach was wracked with pains I don't have words for. I contemplated calling 911 when my chest got heavy, but I waited it out as I tried to manifest an oxygen mask. I drifted between wake and sleep and at 3:40 am I exploded into a cold sweat. I woke up, dried off, and slowly began to join the ranks of the living. I worked a full day. Not much of an appetite, but certainly on the mend.
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